Sitemap - 2023 - Normal Island News
2023 was the greatest year on record for heartless sociopaths
South Africa has launched genocide proceedings against Israel
The IDF smashes the world record of journalists killed
Alternative to king's message was delivered by friend of king
Posh men in fancy dress aroused by disembowelled foxes
King offends war criminals by suggesting we love our neighbours
Santa Claus has been arrested for drunk driving (flying?)
US asks for drunk friend to be exempt from Geneva Conventions
Prince Andrew has been cured of his inability to sweat
Michelle Mone convinces everyone she is telling the truth
Piers Morgan has been humiliated in the High Court
Prince William and Catherine bravely enter food bank to meet peasants
Israel wants experienced actors and director for propaganda video
BBC dehumanises murdered writer in name of impartiality
Israel condemns Palestinians for getting in the way of bombs
Labour leader hires Margaret Thatcher as chief adviser
A tribute to America's most successful war criminal
PM furious Greece wants the stuff we stole from them back
Elon Musk visits apartheid state for nostalgia
Government announces exciting plans to humiliate disabled people
Argentina's new leader makes them the envy of the world
Twitter bans Palestinians from using words that upset colonisers
IDF locates "bunker" under hospital that Israel built in 1983
The Tories are bringing back the PM we are all desperate for
Fears Rishi Sunak could be sacked for sacking Suella Braverman
Suella Braverman pleads with far right to cause trouble
Rishi Sunak asks Suella Braverman for permission to sack her
Man with diamonds on his crown discusses cost of living crisis
Suella Braverman announces plans to eliminate homeless people
Gary Lineker condemned for calling for peace
MPs furious UN has called out Israel's war crimes
Labour leader concerned Gaza ceasefire could lead to violence
UK still won't call for ceasefire during Gaza blackout
Government fears ceasefire would benefit Palestinian children
King Charles says money he took from billionaire not corruption
MPs concerned war criminals' feelings could be hurt by protests
Sunak and Netanyahu pretend to care about Palestinians
IDF investigation confirms hospital blown up by meteorite
Geneva Conventions let British politicians off the hook
DWP declares Sir Michael Caine fit for work at 90
UK politicians worried they've accidentally committed war crimes
Politicians ask focus groups if they should back ethnic cleansing
A new Tory leadership race is underway
Suella Braverman stands on dog's tail
Liz Truss saves the Tory conference from chronic boredom
The police have saved the Tories from peaceful protesters
Gammons in disarray after woman expresses unauthorised opinion
Suella Braverman declares gay people and women aren't real refugees
Police handing in guns because they're not allowed to shoot people
Rupert Murdoch to finally retire at 1,006 years of age
Rishi Sunak vows to destroy all of humanity to win election
Russell Brand gains support from the internet's loudest weirdos
Theresa May breaks reality by revealing she is "woke and proud"
Met Police upset they can no longer get away with brutality
Laura Kuenssberg rebuts hit piece in the Byline Times
Sunak considering putting "Chinese spy" in House of Lords
UK celebrates first anniversary of its greatest ever leader
Government explains it sadly can't fix crumbling schools
King Charles orders family to forget about Prince Andrew's crimes
Donald Trump puts mugshot on exciting range of merchandise
Another one of Putin's close friends has accidentally died
Scotland Yard agrees it’s fine to bribe King Charles
Senior Tories are worried they could be seen as the nasty party
Nadine Dorries is getting paid £84k for doing f*ck all
Rishi Sunak takes inspiration from Russia and Belarus
Nominees too embarrassed to accept peerages from Liz Truss
Sewage falls named UK's most beautiful landmark
Thérèse Coffey has declared war on Greenpeace
Far-right proudly stands with Trump as he faces court
Sunak to issue oil and gas licences to hit net zero targets
Regulator says it's fine to call Matt Hancock "Tw*t Mancock"
British Gas thrilled to announce they have made a killing
US whistleblowers confirm we're being visited by aliens
40-year-old man furious at Barbie movie
Elon Musk chooses X logo because sw*stika would be a bit much
King Charles is getting the hungry children's money
Donald Trump to be arrested for borrowing nuclear secrets
Tories furiously insist they will starve more children than Labour would
Labour leader launches unexpected policy blitz
Liz Truss is paid £15,770 an hour for her main job
The Metropolitan Police are protecting Boris Johnson again
Fight between Elon and Zuck takes dramatic turn
The world's two worst billionaires are at war
Man called Charles handled record haul of stolen goods in Scotland
Bloke called Charles having second coronation in a year
It turns out America is somehow even worse than Britain
Tory government demands an end to human rights
Suella Braverman devastated appeal court won't let her be racist
Thames Water collapse proves only privatisation of essential services works
Boris Johnson accidentally had sex party with Russian spy
Wagner calls off assault on Moscow due to laryngitis
X Factor legend Wagner is on his way to Moscow to fight Putin
Bank of England decides to f*ck the working class
The national debt reaches 100% of GDP thanks to the Tories
The lettuce says being compared to Liz Truss was not funny
Man celebrates first birthday 74 years after his birth
Privileges Committee confirms Downing St was brilliant fun during lockdown
Democracy has finally been destroyed by heroic Tories
Dishonoured man honours his cronies in totally legit process
Boris Johnson complains he was forced out by "facts and evidence"
Boris Johnson looks set to be found guilty of talking crap
Boris Johnson caught in compromising position with a clothes horse
Mizzy has taken Meghan Markle's place as gammon enemy no. 1
The Tories have gone to war with each other over the Covid inquiry
Government magically un-loses incriminating Boris Johnson diaries
Co-presenter gives harrowing account of time with Phillip Schofield
Prime Minister Suella Braverman has sent Rishi Sunak to Rwanda
Suella Braverman accepts full responsibility and sacks Rishi Sunak
Matt Hancock insists he's "human", triggering scientific debate
Lee Anderson hails the Turd Reich at the Nat-C conference
Margaret Thatcher "totally on board" with the Nat-Cs
Thérèse Coffey has officially killed the river Lim
Priti Patel uncovers socialist plot to force Britain into the UK
Twitter is getting a new CEO and she is truly incredible
Liz Truss flies to Taiwan to save them from China
Prince Andrew consoles fellow sex offender Donald Trump after court defeat
Bloke called Charles gets first job at the age of 74
The Tory Sewage Party™ can't understand why it lost so badly
Protesters to face jail for holding up blank pieces of card
30p Lee furious police chief treated him like an idiot
Public will be asked to swear allegiance to bloke called Charles
Woman arrested for immolating 356-year-old Jacob Rees-Mogg
Akshata Murthy owns £700 million of shares in Russian unicorn farms
Weapon of mass destruction causes terror in the UK
Dominic Raab reinstated as deputy prime minister
Raab confirms he is innocent of the thing he resigned for
Bloke called Charles suspected head of world's biggest crime family
Shards from Christ's cross to be used in coronation
Rishi Sunak's best friend to investigate conflict of interests
Tories distraught they could lose 1,000 seats in local elections
King Charles III urged to apologise for slavery links
Senior Tories suspect Suella Braverman might actually be racist
Meghan staying away from coronation due to paedophile concerns
UK set to be worst performing economy in G20
Join me on Notes, it's much better than Twitter!
Twitter applies "Government-funded Media" label to the BBC
Jesus has risen and he said Jacob Rees-Mogg is a massive knob
Space Karen is trying to destroy me again
Government confirms refugee barge is exactly like a prison ship
Sewage problem solved by keeping mouths closed while swimming
Biden says he can't attend coronation because Camilla is really annoying
Tory Party takes £3.5 million from climate change sceptics
French ask "Charles III do you know the guillotine?"
Suella Braverman becomes first person to be flown to Rwanda
Tories ecstatic living standards are falling by largest amount ever
Government announces exciting plans to crush the working class
We're using Lineker to distract you from all the other shit
Laura Kuenssberg is the new presenter of Match of the Day
UK reduces number of illegal asylum applications to zero
Former Daily Mail journalist forced to claim Universal Credit
Former prime minister Boris Johnson could be forced to resign as MP
Rishi Sunak explains the single market is brilliant...
Government reassures public only lefties impacted by voter ID laws
Tenants distraught that buy-to-let landlords are in financial trouble
Tory government announces incredible new Brexit benefit
Prime Minister vows to jail mothers who steal baby formula
Police advise women on how to avoid tempting men to become murderers
Government says it's currently unable to fix the UK's problems
The Tory Party is set to win just 12 seats at the next election
Nadine Dorries wants my title of "world's greatest TV journalist"
Truss declares war on Sunak's left-wing economic establishment
Liz Truss planning leadership bid that absolutely no one asked for!
Only major economy set to shrink in 2023 insists Brexit is going brilliantly
Nadhim Zahawi to be appointed as government's ethics adviser
Tories vote to save proud British tradition of turds on beaches
Bullying probe dropped after Raab puts Sunak's head down toilet
Chief Brexiter Tim Martin closing his pubs because of Brexit
PM warns if he tackles corruption, he'll have no cabinet left
Inflation now so bad 30p Lee has been renamed 42p Lee
Nadhim Zahawi not going to jail because he is a Tory
Idiots agree Richard Madeley is right about everything
Experts confirm 2022 was the year we reached those unlit shitlands